Amber got up slowly and her voice was flat, but the words were right. Let it lie. Foreman bent down to untie his runners and pulled them off, dropping them back by the door before heading for the bathroom. He pulled his shirt over his head and hooked his sweats over his hips, then started the water running. While he waited for it to run hot, he sat on the toilet seat, elbows propped on his knees, shoulders hunched, staring at the floor tiles without really seeing them. The conversation hung over him, clouding his thoughts. Amber knew the problem, she saw the problem, but she wasn't going to do anything about it. Accept and deal. That casual blitheness left him with a bad taste in his mouth, but what the hell had he ever done that was better?
He reached out a palm to check the water and found it hot enough. Stepping in should have been a relief after the cold outside and the tightness in his muscles. Breathing in the steam only seemed to clog his throat up further. He started scrubbing himself down mechanically, getting clean without taking any pleasure in the heat. The world was fucked for him, but it was fucked worse for his parents forty years ago, and it would be fucked worse for Marcus when he came up for parole in two years. Nothing was fair. Big goddamn revelation. It hadn't stopped Foreman from getting ahead, from showing up every asshole who'd ever tried to keep him down. He'd left good enough behind in the dust. He was better than that. Better than every single person who'd ever laughed behind their hands at him or assumed without a thought that he just wouldn't measure up. A resident he'd had during his internship had been the first one to tell him to his face that's what it would take. Foreman had thought that 4.0 would do it all for him, he'd been resentful when his resident rode him harder than anyone else. That's what it takes. If you want to be good enough, you have to be better. Either get that into your head or give up now.
Foreman hadn't given up. And he knew better now, too. He twisted off the water and wrapped a towel around his waist before heading for the bedroom and the clothes he'd left there last night, a pair of khaki pants and a casual shirt. He'd deal with Amber's family on his own, stop expecting more. He knew he could depend on himself. That decided, Foreman shook off the lingering resentment and headed to the kitchen, his stomach clamouring for whatever Amber had pulled together for their meal.
no subject
He reached out a palm to check the water and found it hot enough. Stepping in should have been a relief after the cold outside and the tightness in his muscles. Breathing in the steam only seemed to clog his throat up further. He started scrubbing himself down mechanically, getting clean without taking any pleasure in the heat. The world was fucked for him, but it was fucked worse for his parents forty years ago, and it would be fucked worse for Marcus when he came up for parole in two years. Nothing was fair. Big goddamn revelation. It hadn't stopped Foreman from getting ahead, from showing up every asshole who'd ever tried to keep him down. He'd left good enough behind in the dust. He was better than that. Better than every single person who'd ever laughed behind their hands at him or assumed without a thought that he just wouldn't measure up. A resident he'd had during his internship had been the first one to tell him to his face that's what it would take. Foreman had thought that 4.0 would do it all for him, he'd been resentful when his resident rode him harder than anyone else. That's what it takes. If you want to be good enough, you have to be better. Either get that into your head or give up now.
Foreman hadn't given up. And he knew better now, too. He twisted off the water and wrapped a towel around his waist before heading for the bedroom and the clothes he'd left there last night, a pair of khaki pants and a casual shirt. He'd deal with Amber's family on his own, stop expecting more. He knew he could depend on himself. That decided, Foreman shook off the lingering resentment and headed to the kitchen, his stomach clamouring for whatever Amber had pulled together for their meal.